Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Ayabhai

Schabir Shaik is a smarter skelm than Selebi, because whos finished and klaar now?

Ben Trovato | 11 December, 2011 01:16

An open garner to Jackie Selebi

DEAR Jackie, what rotten luck to have to go to put behind bars for simply accepting money from that fat lout from the Cosa Nostra. What was it - R165000? The mean(a) traffic cop in the Eastern Cape pockets that on a busy weekend. You should have taken a paging out of Schabir Shaiks astronomic black book of bribery. Go big or go home. He did both. You did neither.

I wrote to you in July 2010 in brief after your conviction and I am delighted that you took my advice. In case you have forgotten, this is what I said: The root tone of voice towards preparing yourself for prison is to change the way you eat. The Shaik Diet is simple and easy. You occupy to eat a kilogram of butter with every repast of a dozen ostrich eggs, two dozen steak and kidney pies and a kilo of cheddar stuffed inside a loaf of clear bread. Wash it down with a gallon of Klippies and Coke.

If this is a prescribed meal to you, then double the ingredients. You have to push your cholesterin levels and blood pressure through the roof so that the first slamming of your cell door sends you into toxic shock and onto a stretcher. From the queasy bay, call your secretary and ask her to check your jacket pockets.

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You essential have a doctor in there somewhere. indeed its five nights in a private hospital and, badabing badaboom, youre fanny in your own bed with just 40 historic period left to live.

I see you added a few touches of your own. healthy done. I like a man with initiative. I was impress by your inviting a couple of friends around to watch the tidings to see if your appeal succeeded. As far as high-stakes frolic goes, not even the final episode of Survivor beats that one. Falling to the lounge floor with eyes rolling madly might have been a bit over the bring in for some, but this was one occasion that called for theatrics on a baronial scale.

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